Can you remember who taught you to tie your shoelaces? I can remember who, where, my age where I was, and also, exactly where I was sitting. It was a mustard yellow, single seater, vinyl couch in the lounge room at my Aunt and Uncles home. Uncle Arlindo was my teacher and I was 6 years old.
I remember his patience and kindness, as he first showed me, and then guided me, as I began to do it for myself. The process, I can vividly remember, firstly doing the loop myself, lifting the other shoelace over (small fingers all in the way) and through to create my very first bow. It was a little loose for my first time, so my Uncle showed me how to make it tight by pulling both loops away from each other, whilst still holding them tightly, between my finger and my thumb.
What an achievement it was and I felt so proud of myself, as though I had ‘grown up’ in that moment and no longer needed ‘help’ to put my shoes on! It was a significant milestone, this is why I remember it so well. Perhaps, it was the independence and the sense of personal achievement I felt in that moment, and a necessary part of my childhood, to move from dependence to some independence. It was a momentous ‘step’ towards being a ‘big girl’ now!
Isn’t life like this though? Every challenge, new skill, or achievement creates a sense of ‘growing up’ and independence. Knowing our-Self better and what we are capable of. Each time we ‘step’ into a yet unknown or new area, it’s as though we are ‘tying our shoelaces’ for the first time.
It is important to look back at past achievements and moments of true independence, as well as honour - even if just quietly in our heart - those people in our lives who helped us grow.
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